This one I do take fucking personally. I thought you loved me Natalie....well that all went to hell. I guess I'll be your memory

So we trade liquor for blood in an attempt to tip the scales.
I think you lost what you loved in that mess of details.
They seemed so important at the time
but now you can’t even recall any of the names, faces, or lines.
It is more the feeling of it all.


So long Natalie, hope you find happiness someday. And if you already have yay for you. You don't need me anymore, you have Clara and Preston and Sami....no room for Erika. That's fine I guess. It's not like we've been friends since 6th grade or anything. You didn't do anything to save this friendship....ok that's fine too. Do what you want with your life Natalie...because I'm not a part of it anymore. We are done.......and you're ok with that.....maybe I'm just not. O fucking well, I'll get over it. Good bye Natalie, see you on the dark side.

--
<sub>i am the second
alone in a faceless crowd
a human caught
in monochrome dreams
i scream to wake up
my voice drowns deep underground
only the dead can hear me,
see me



(\m/)(~.^)(\m/)</sub>

oh, it's not at all like every time i say something to you, you blow up?

--
and the lobsters in wheelchairs.

i've tried, i really have. maybe i just get angry extremely easy. but i did not want to blow up at you, like i did last year. oh, why did i do that? because i fucking cared about you. when i blow up, i say things i shouldn't. and i don't want that to happen.

--
and the lobsters in wheelchairs.

ok, that wasn't worded quite right.
why DIDN"T i blow up at you this year? because i fucking cared about you. i didn't want you to get hurt like you did last year.

--
and the lobsters in wheelchairs.

you pushed me away.
you pushed me away every time you glared at me for speaking my mind
you pushed me away every time you blew up at me for an indifferent comment.
you pushed me away every time you pointed the finger at me, when i didn't do it.
you pushed me away every time you never told me what was going on, and wondered why i didn't "care." Because i didn't know. how was i supposed to care, when i never knew?
you pushed me away ever time you made a comment behind my back.
you pushed me away, goddamnit.
and maybe i haven't done my part either, but don't put all the blame on me, like you always seem to do. maybe i screw things up.
ok. i do.
i just screw everything up.
whatever.

--
and the lobsters in wheelchairs.

uhm.. I don't want to interupt in this, seems kind of a peronal thing with you, and don't get mad at me for this, but I really liked the poem.. =/ =S

--
Deliverance...
Thrown back at me...

Deliverance...
Laughing at me...

Well, I would confront you on this but your bf will beat me down if I fucking talk to you. Because he's fucking like that. Whatever, you didn't act like you cared. I didn't do everything but I left you alone. Like you wanted

IF YOU LOVED ME YOU WOULD HAVE AT LEAST AKNOWLEDGED MY PRESENCE. SO ALL YOU CAN FUCKING DO IS WRITE HOSTILE POETRY ABOUT ME



(hmm writing hostile poetry reminds me of me.)

You said you hate my suffering
That you understood and you'd take care of me
You'd always be there
Well where are you now


^Haligh Haligh a Lie Haligh



Do you care now? When I need the most help..no you're bitching at me. Do you care? Huh, Huh??? Do you????

--
<sub>i am the second
alone in a faceless crowd
a human caught
in monochrome dreams
i scream to wake up
my voice drowns deep underground
only the dead can hear me,
see me



(\m/)(~.^)(\m/)</sub>

Feel the wrath of Erika. Burrrrn.


*boogie*

--
x - Sex reminds her of eatin' Spaghetti - x

i'm not mad at you!
thank you, very much!

--
and the lobsters in wheelchairs.